Planification | The best coffee in Paris

Dog Days for France and its economy, including for the once so successful French Exports. But, France has a “Plan” (“roadmap” in non marxist economic language) for competitiveness and all that needs (serious) fixing in the best and brightest of countries.

The best and brightest bought many German cars and Rolex watches, since François Mitterrand introduced “une certaine idée de la social-démocratie à la Berluti” and Jacques Delors’ daughter “une certaine idée de l’économie et du travail”. Some people also complain about the Euro, but this is a side-factor to the French loss of … mind(s)

Not that the situation be unsustainable yet, but as IMF, OCDE, S&P, ECB, WEF, Roubini, Angela Merkel and other stock exchange, markets, ecology and weather optimistic experts would say : “It’s grave, serious and worsening“, which is of course not a good reason to lose the sense of humor into the bargain.

Fortunately, France has a top secret French plan.

And everybody on earth wonders about “The New ~~Soviet~~ Frenchonomics Plan”.

Many competitors in the world are frightened by The ~~Napoleonic~~ French Plan.

Spain and Italy no longer ~~waste the money they don’t have like the Greeks or French~~ sleep at night (which is not really a problem as most people are unemployed there : either they are civil servants or just they are not employed at all, so they can sleep all day, and anyway everybody sleeps by all means every afternoon for “siesta” and gets special siesta bonus due to summer heat).

Even the ~~Capitalists~~ Chinese fear the ~~Socialist~~ French Plan …

Only the ~~realistic~~ Germans don’t care. But they never do when ~~Fantasy~~ France speaks, thinks, paints, draws, plays, sings or writes instead of working. Besides, they are busy because they don’t have 45 days of summer holiday like the French (which partly explains some things about the respective competitiveness of both neighboring but so different countries).

And ~~everybody~~ the Brits laugh (LMAO) about the ~~“Grande Nation”~~ French Plan. But they always do about France as a matter of principle (and because they know France all too well). Besides, they are so happy with their incredibly dry summer weather and their medals at the London Olympic Games, and so drunk celebrating the Queen’s Jubilee, the Commonwealth resilience and the fortune their banksters make cheating on the Libor, dealing with Iran, money laundering and surely many other Cititricks, that they laugh all the time about ~~that good “Tapis Rouge” joke by David Cameron at the Los Cabos G20 Crisis Summit~~ everything.

But the French never mind about ~~facts in real life~~ the Brits, the Germans, or whoever usually, or newly, beats them at ~~football~~ sports, exports, war, business, economics, Scrabble, gastronomy, arts, haute couture, car building, bérets basques, chicken, olympic games, #occupy (or whatever doesn’t work anymore in France as the French don’t work).

Stop talking, walk the talk !

Why the Hell should the French care about details ? They have real problems to solve (like the prix of the baguette which pourrait augmenter if the government ne fait rien, with la hausse des cours du blé, the réforme of the PAC et la sécheresse dans the other countries producteurs, et ça serait bad pour l’inflation, le foreign trade and the climat social) and important issues to think about.

Classical French way of walking the talk …

Anyway, they love to hire the best and most expensive international consultants and advertisers (not to mention lobbyists), as they know there could be conflicts of interest, political bias or technical mistakes if they just read the numerous reports of their “Cour des Comptes” …

Classical French way of not walking the talk

Though they could just read the 2012 Terra Nova report on the issue of competitiveness by Louis Schweitzer and the late Olivier Ferrand : “Une politique globale de compétitivité pour la France“…

… or the reports of their Conseil d’Analyse Economique …

… or the reports de l’observatoire de la compétitivité (Luxembourg)

… or the report of la commission Attali (2008) …

… or le rapport Ruef-Armand (1960) …

…or something about Jacques Coeur (century XV) …

… or even less appropriate and reliable (because in English, among other reasons, and French don’t read English except at wartime, and they have not understood yet, that the world is at economic war, and they don’t trust what is not written by and in French anyway) WEF notes, OECD papers or EU laws or … whatever works.

All this may help, at least, it cannot (h)arm more (armoire ? armure ?) the French competitiveness.

All the more, since they have organized a “dialogue social”summit (the French call that kind of things a “Grenelle” or a “Banquet Républicain”, depending on the number of meals and quality of the food, foreign journalists say “Frogs Party with a Champagne Cocktail“) before their summer holiday, where they didn’t talk about competitiveness, of course, but realized it could be an issue.

And since they have ~~elected~~ appointed new dream teams and administrative task forces to ~~copy~~ write reports (to tell the truth, they have a talent to write reports, and even schools, diplomas and elections for that) in economic war rooms and propose … yet another plan.

Karine Berger, a former (d)economist and co-writer, was parachuted and elected as socialist Députée somewhere in the French countryside in June 2012 and some journalists believe that she could have been appointed as a Secretary for Foreign Trade but missed the opportunity due to some gas leaks in Guyane. God only knows … (but to tell the truth, her book is less stupid than the title that was chosen for marketing)

God ~~can make miracles~~ bless France … (the good news is, the French believe in many Gods and they know for sure that : “Impossible n’est pas français”).

In ~~socialism and dialogue social~~ God (and Gallois) the French trust … So, they have planned, plan and will plan, again and again(st all ods) …

Eureka !

And they trust ~~the French~~ their Frenchonomics may work (Frenchonomics rule 2 : “sur un malentendu, ça pourrait marcher”, rule number 3 being :”Le prix s’oublie -especially when paid by taxpayers or future taxpayers-, la qualité reste -unless somebody cheated on the contract which tends to happen with so called public money-“).

Or not, as usually happens when the socialists (or whoever, in fact, with very few exceptions since Mr Louis XIV died) rule, but they don’t care that much as long as it lasts (Frenchonomics rule 1 : “Pourvu que ça dure …”).

Then, if “doesn’t work”, go ~~to London~~ ask Angela with your best romantic smile, to ask for more ~~croissance~~ money, as usual (Frenchonomics rule 4 : “The Germans can and must pay, if you don’t know why, they do !”).

Frenchonomics …

Soon, the French may have to ~~call the IMF, or sell some more hotels and paintings, or write some more reports, or escape to London or waste less or … work more~~ realize the world has changed more than France, whatever their professional ~~football players~~ politicians may say.

It’s 4G, Stupid !

Because France should change ~~strategy for call centers, consultants, recruitment procedures, summer holiday habits, whatever doesn’t work and cannot last much longer~~.

France ought to ~~think~~ work ~~different~~.

France could read ~~another~~ a book for free (which is good news, in view of their budget situation).

France can twit different (Yes we can … Twit Higher, Faster, Farther … Smarter).

Tag Archives: Planification

Dog Days For #Frenchonomics, but #France has a #Plan for #Competitiveness

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